My Love/Hate Relationship with Proof-Reading

Once I do it, I love it, I like thinking of new ways of writing something or finding my mistakes and knowing that I made my paper better with my fantastic corrections, additions, or deletions. I even like finding my mistakes, I feel smarter because I was able to find a mistake. But the problem is that it is so hard for me to start proof-reading. I always procrastinate doing it, and my theory is because I don't want to address the mistakes that I made, because, well, I would like to be perfect every time the first time around. I don't like the wake-up call that I get when proof-reading. I am forced to accept, yet again, that I am not as grand as I like to think. Sometimes I like to turn papers in without proof-reading because then I don't have to be brought down to a lower level on the "Rachel-is-really-awesome-building" that I tend to reside in, even if my paper makes me sound like a bigger idiot than I am because I didn't catch mistakes.